You know , lately I have been thinking about how grief is not just about the death of people but also the death of dreams, expectations and am giving myself permission to grieve those. I just thought I would share.
Oooh, I was saving that for tomorrow. Tangible and ambiguous grief are two sides of the same coin.
Ambiguous grief is one of those things that can only be seen through tears. Your insight makes me feel like you’ve shed a couple of vision clarifying tears.
I have wondered about the callousness or numbness of my heart when I read about a tragedy, particularly with a child, and just scroll on to the next story. Pausing to grieve with humanity and our Lord is important. I think I fear being so overcome with grief for people I don’t know that I won’t be able to care for the ones I do.
I think we all struggle with that fear of being so overcome by grief that we WON’T be able to care for others. AS I look back, I realize that one of the unintended consequences is that I DON’T care very well for others when apathy kicks in.
I’ve thought of this while working in hospitals. You go into healthcare wanting to be used by God to help others, but realize it’s set up like any other Business. It’s so easy to become numb to people passing away because you’re so busy. I used to pray for every one of my patients, the MDs, and staff, but it faded...
Thanks for this! It’s confirmation to some lingering thoughts of why am I even still in this job lol...I’ve gotta take that time to pause, allow myself to feel that emotion, and pray for those patients assigned to me.
I think everyone of us that goes into any type of public or social service finds ourself there. Trouble gets so normalized that we start to think the only way to deal with it’s weight on us is to not focus on it so intently. For me it was a way to cope, in an attempt for “care for myself” I ended up not caring very well for others.
Jul 18, 2023·edited Jul 18, 2023Liked by John Onwuchekwa
i'm tracking with Sarah as death of relationship came to mind. You pray and hope for its renewal, but for now there's the reality of loss.
"Anywhere I'm looking at something, i believe it's meant to tell us about something else" made me think of Paul writing about creation being subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it. Dying leaves...death, wasn't part of the original plan.
Perhaps grief, tears are a byproduct of love. ‘ I love you, I know you, therefore your pain touches me. My Timeline is shocking , disturbing but i am an observer. On the other hand I walked into a grocery store yesterday and was overcome. I’d watched neighbors spend the day on the bus to get groceries, only getting what they could carry in that food desert. A store had been promised there for decades. Now it is real. The security guard came to see if this weeping old lady was ok! Tears are funny things. Go figure.
You know , lately I have been thinking about how grief is not just about the death of people but also the death of dreams, expectations and am giving myself permission to grieve those. I just thought I would share.
Oooh, I was saving that for tomorrow. Tangible and ambiguous grief are two sides of the same coin.
Ambiguous grief is one of those things that can only be seen through tears. Your insight makes me feel like you’ve shed a couple of vision clarifying tears.
I have wondered about the callousness or numbness of my heart when I read about a tragedy, particularly with a child, and just scroll on to the next story. Pausing to grieve with humanity and our Lord is important. I think I fear being so overcome with grief for people I don’t know that I won’t be able to care for the ones I do.
I think we all struggle with that fear of being so overcome by grief that we WON’T be able to care for others. AS I look back, I realize that one of the unintended consequences is that I DON’T care very well for others when apathy kicks in.
I’ve thought of this while working in hospitals. You go into healthcare wanting to be used by God to help others, but realize it’s set up like any other Business. It’s so easy to become numb to people passing away because you’re so busy. I used to pray for every one of my patients, the MDs, and staff, but it faded...
Thanks for this! It’s confirmation to some lingering thoughts of why am I even still in this job lol...I’ve gotta take that time to pause, allow myself to feel that emotion, and pray for those patients assigned to me.
I think everyone of us that goes into any type of public or social service finds ourself there. Trouble gets so normalized that we start to think the only way to deal with it’s weight on us is to not focus on it so intently. For me it was a way to cope, in an attempt for “care for myself” I ended up not caring very well for others.
i'm tracking with Sarah as death of relationship came to mind. You pray and hope for its renewal, but for now there's the reality of loss.
"Anywhere I'm looking at something, i believe it's meant to tell us about something else" made me think of Paul writing about creation being subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it. Dying leaves...death, wasn't part of the original plan.
Perhaps grief, tears are a byproduct of love. ‘ I love you, I know you, therefore your pain touches me. My Timeline is shocking , disturbing but i am an observer. On the other hand I walked into a grocery store yesterday and was overcome. I’d watched neighbors spend the day on the bus to get groceries, only getting what they could carry in that food desert. A store had been promised there for decades. Now it is real. The security guard came to see if this weeping old lady was ok! Tears are funny things. Go figure.
Wow! Tears really are funny things! What a great reason to cry.